A closer look at the new alternative-means to pay the bills
I’m sitting in a Starbucks pretending to be Veronica Mars, spying behind my laptop. One part of me is excited to be fulfilling a childhood dream, while another part is scared out of my mind for my friend, sitting across from me, waiting to meet the man who will potentially pay for her education, her car, and her rent.
SeekingArrangement.com is a web service that matches rich men and women in a “mutually beneficial relationships” with those who are less-rich and usually younger. Just last year, the University of Guelph made the site’s top 10 of Canada’s “Fastest Growing Sugar Baby Colleges of 2012,” and it has continued to grow in popularity on campus.
Currently over two million people are registered to use to service – nearly double the registered users in 2012. Most “sugar babies” on the site fall into the 18 to 27 age range – and, given some shocking numbers concerning the financial state of students, this makes a lot of sense.
The Canadian Federation of Students-Ontario estimates that the average student debt in Ontario is about $37,000. At a scant average of $10,222 dollars per student of financial aid allotted for the entirety of a degree (even though it costs about $10,000 per year to attend university in the province). Ontario also sits tenth out of ten provinces for its student aid program.
With financial worry hanging over the heads of students, and fewer jobs available each year, perhaps it logically follows that students are on the lookout for alternative sources of income.
Each user on the site is asked to be upfront about what they are looking for. Most user profiles for “sugar parents” claim to be looking for companionship and good conversation. The “sugar babies,” by either explicit statement or unspoken agreement, are looking for financial support. The parties must agree on all terms, and must also have a base level of chemistry, although the site explicitly states that sex is not a requirement.
As I wait for the “sugar daddy” to arrive, I can’t help but let my sceptical side jump to the worst of conclusions. I was sure he would be approximately 75 years old, without any hair and with really terrible halitosis. He would expect her to have sex with him in the washroom of that very Starbucks, and all for a knock-off Michael Kors watch.
In reality, the “sugar daddy” is only 36, decently cute, and keeps his hands to himself. He tells my friend that he’s just gotten out of a long relationship, that he is busy with work, and that he doesn’t have the time or energy to go out and meet people. He’s looking for someone who is a good conversationalist to visit him a few times a month, as well as accompany him on business trips to Florida and New York. She can have her own room, and she is only expected to look pretty and be charming at work events.
In return, he will help pay for her tuition, car insurance, and rent. She will also receive occasional gifts, and he will pay for all travel expenses. He says he specifically is looking for a student, not because he’s a “creepy, old, weird dude,” but because he remembers what it was like being over $100,000 dollars in debt after his MBA.
Perhaps my friend got really lucky on her first go-around, or perhaps SeekingArrangement.com isn’t as sketchy as it appears at first glance. While it’s paramount that precautions be taken when setting up one of these “mutually beneficial” arrangements, I can’t help but think that if I were rich, and people were either intimidated by my wealth or using me for it, I wouldn’t mind paying for someone who was attractive, witty, and intelligent to keep me company. Perhaps this site is no sketchier than any other dating site – save for the power imbalance that the money necessitates.