Rethinking men’s roles in feminist spaces
Feminism is undeniably one of the definitive revolutions of the millennial generation. Fundamentally and absolutely, feminism is the belief that all genders are completely equal regardless of race, sexual orientation, biological sex, or gender expression. As a movement, feminism focuses its scope and emphasis on the marginalized voices of women, as well as intersectional minorities such as Trans* individuals, and people of colour. Urged on by well-known public figures such as Laverne Cox, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Emma Watson – all of who identify as feminist – youth culture has begun to turn its massive attention on the plight of those marginalized by Patriarchal systems.
In the 21st, the current incarnation of feminism has been working to clarify the enemy of equality as the societal paradigm that places heterosexual cis-gendered white “masculine” men on top – the Patriarchy, and not men themselves. Moving away from the disastrous second wave, feminism seeks to expose how the Patriarchy has a negative and detrimental effect on all members of society.
A portion of modern feminists have begun to question if men’s voices should have a realized voice in dialogues concerning sexism and feminism. Others go so far as to argue that due to their favoritism in the social hierarchy, men cannot be feminists. Most feminists agree that parsing out who can be what, and when, is the antithesis of feminism. Denying men’s voices could become a slippery slope leading to the failings of previous waves: misandry, ignorance, and hypocrisy. Yet some are still inclined to argue that men (especially heterosexual, cis-gendered, white men) cannot identify with being a marginalized group, and thus cannot sympathize with the struggles faced by women. The reluctance felt by some in allowing men a voice could perhaps stem from the unconscious weight our culture seems to place on the words of men in pedagogical domains. There is worry that we may be inclined to place emphasis on the experiences of men, or that the potentially dissenting voices of men could drown out genuine concerns voiced and felt by those victimized by the Patriarchy. Other feminists boil it down to wanting a safe space, soberly stating that while not all men have victimized women, all women have been victimized by men.
I firmly believe that men can be feminists, but I think problems arise from manipulating feminism in order to cater to men. Many of the arguments and theories used to draw men into the field of feminism revolve around showing men how Patriarchal values affect them negatively and how Patriarchal systems damage women they personally know. These two arguments are well intentioned, but are extremely problematic in similar fashions. It is extremely important to point out the damages suffered by men because of the Patriarchy: men are expected to be tough, should control their emotions, and hide vulnerability. By saying women should cover themselves to avoid assault or distracting men, we are saying that men are weak animals, unable to control their urges. These are all important injustices faced by men, but some feminists argue that by “dumbing” down feminism and only highlighting how sexism affects men, we are making it a “man’s issue” instead of an “everyone’s issue.”
Another criticism pointed out frequently by renowned feminists is the “what if it was your sister” argument. Men are encouraged to avoid raping or sexually assaulting women through the attempted “humanization” of women by asking men “what if that girl was your sister/mother/daughter.” Deeply problematic, this sinister rhetoric is essentially stating that women are only human – and thus worthy of not being raped – in their relation to other men. It should be enough that women are autonomous, thinking and feeling human beings in themselves; not just because they are some other man’s daughter.
Feminism should openly and unapologetically be a minority figure’s issue, but pandering to the dominant powers in society in order to make it more palatable risks jeopardizing the movement. Do we cater more and more to men until all discussions of feminism revolve around men’s issues? Where do we draw the line? Simply put, women are tired of having to hold men’s hands through feminism. It should be enough that their fellow human beings are suffering globally. Men can truly identify as feminist so long as their concern is completely for the whole and not just for themselves. We cannot expect equal opportunity for women if men are not allowed the freedom to give it.