It has now been one week since the newly appointed Liberal government delivered their throne speech, and the nation is still mulling over the commitments and promises made by the new Liberal government. Among the new initiatives outlined, the most intriguing for the average Canadian could be the newly established Department of Positive Public Image (DPPI). Headed by Millbrook Liberal MP Anthony Deeks, the DPPI has issued a mission statement, promising to improve the public image of the government by listening to Canadians and finding out what they really want. The DPPI has already been hard at work and, on Dec. 7th, 2015, released their first action plan on how to win back the hearts of Canadians. The arrived-upon answer? Sequels. The federal government has decided that every future party platform hoping to lead the nation of Canada must be a sequel to a previously established parliament, and must provide further franchising opportunities. With this startling and no doubt controversial announcement, Anthony Deeks, in an interview with The Globe and Mail, outlines what this means for the current Liberal government of Canada.
“We felt the major success of the previous Conservative government was the name recognition that they had in both the country, as well as around the world. Everyone knew that the government of Canada was ‘The Harper Government’ and, when things went sour, everyone knew exactly who to blame.” Deeks continued, “Environmentalists were no longer standing over oil-soaked otters and shaking their fists at the sky, cursing the government of Canada. They were now vowing vengeance against the Harper government, and we feel this is a spirit we would like to maintain going forward.”
The comprehensive report, which can be found at the DPPI’s website, outlines the changes that will come to the government over the next four years. The most immediate of these modifications to the current Liberal government is that, effective Dec. 9th, 2015, the government of Canada will hereby be known as “The Government of Trudeau II: Electric Boogaloo,” or simply “Trudeau II” when in less formal situations. The name change is, according to the DPPI report, meant to “convey the fresh energy brought to the table by our new prime minister, while also riding the coattails of his family’s political history.” Already the Conservative Party has responded, publishing their own release wherein they name the son of Brian Mulroney, and current Etalk host, Ben Mulroney as their new party leader. Interim leader Rona Ambrose has announced that she is “confident that Ben’s youth, good hair and utter lack of knowledge on how to run a country, are exactly what the Conservative party needs to lead this great nation.”