What’s with all the padding?
By, Dominique Tassell
The football game, it’s part of the quintessential college experience… or maybe that’s just what movies have fooled me into thinking. Either way, it was high on my list of things to do while on exchange for a semester here at the University of Guelph. As an Australian, I know pretty much nothing about American football. As a result, I was left with a lot of questions after watching my first game. What better place to pose them than in the school newspaper?
My first thought was that on TV and movies they definitely don’t show the part about “downs” and the team having to get the ball 10 yards down the field to keep the ball. That’s kind of a core part of the game. So TV and movies are misleading. Shocker. Also, don’t these games usually happen at night in TV and movies? Overall, I felt extremely lied to.
As far as gameplay, I knew when we scored a goal, but that was about it. Yes, I have since been informed it is not called “a goal.” Although, surely it’s not called a touchdown when we kick the ball through the hoops, is it? This game is complicated. Like, overly complicated.
I was deeply confused as to why the umpires just let the fouls add up. It was bizarre. Someone explained it to me, but I still don’t get it. I grew up watching rugby. Which leads me to my next point: Why is there so much padding?
Do they throw away the ball once it’s been used, or do they keep them around the field for convenience? This is a genuine question I would like answered. I even tried Googling it.
There were so many people on the sidelines. There were so many players not playing. There must have been like thirty players not on the field.
For some reason, as I watched I kept flashing back to this one very bad Disney movie where the tortured quarterback kid tried to compare football to fairy tales—or something like that. He goes on about heroes and villains… it was ridiculous and hilarious. I’ve seen better football movies, I swear, but that one just kept coming into my head for some reason.
I took issue with the whole drinking tent thing. I didn’t expect it to be such a family event, full of little gryphons and whatnot. I thought it would be more college debauchery, which it definitely was not.
Why were there so many advertisements? And why were they all for milk and meat? I get that this is a farming community, but still. I don’t know why I found them so funny, but I did.
I absolutely loved how they have those pump up videos or whatever they’re called, where it’s all the players and it’s super dramatic. They were so good. Australia would never. I went to a baseball game in Toronto and the players danced to “Baby Shark,” which was also fantastic. Sports here are much more family oriented than I expected. Back home we just watch sports and get drunk. Or maybe that’s just me.
Why did so many people leave at halftime? Honestly, I understand showing up late, but leaving early… you’re missing the final score! Though I totally understand if you left to go watch the women’s rugby team because frankly they’re the best team we’ve got and deserve the fanfare and extravagance that the football team gets.
While I was confused for the majority of the game, I actually had a really fun time. It’s definitely worth going, especially considering Guelph students get in for free. The best part about the game is the atmosphere. The best part about school here, in fact, is the atmosphere. There’s so much pride in the school and our teams, and that’s something I wish we had more of back home. So yeah, I might need to Google a few things, but I’d consider myself a football fan. Even though I’ll definitely get in trouble for calling anything but soccer football.