Warner Bros’ latest MonsterVerse movie is here, and if you were looking for cheesy characters and cathartic action, that’s exactly what you’ll get
The climactic event of Warner Bros’ “MonsterVerse” is finally here, in a cinematic landscape that is just as unforgiving as the central titans who battle it out. The enduring attraction of these kaiju (Japanese for giant monsters) is so powerful that, according to Entertainment Weekly, it amassed the largest box office total of the COVID-19 era.
It’s easy to see why the film is continuing to break pandemic box office records: it’s a cathartically dumb feast of destruction that you’ll want to partake in regularly. It’s the cinematic Big Mac, akin to junk food that perfectly satisfies our drunken late-night need for sustenance.
What seems like endless minutes of idiotic characters spouting exposition with a tiresome drawl is immediately forgiven when the two colossi lock eyes.
In terms of plot, Godzilla Vs. Kong follows the titular ape and his human overseers as they journey to his homeworld to uncover a potentially strong power source while Godzilla attempts to stop them with equally destructive efforts. Yep — that’s about it!
The film’s lackadaisical approach to storytelling makes it clear that it knows exactly what the audience is there for: the cataclysmic bouts between the monsters, which deliver on their promised spectacle. However, once they’re over you’ll find yourself face-palming as you’re met with continuous lackluster dialogue and characterization.
While the latter was to be expected (most MonsterVerse films are guilty of this), the sheer stupidity of the film’s eyeroll inducing plot is sure to catch even the most seasoned cheesy action connoisseurs off guard.
Through their dialogue, characters quickly transform from lifeless husks to frustrating robots, making viewers wish they never opened their mouths. The worst of these moments is when the plot threatens to take center stage in one of the final battles. It made me wish for simple characters who just react to the monsters’ fighting instead of taking a vested role in the action.
CINEMATOGRAPHY: 2/2
DIRECTION: 1/2
SCREENPLAY: 1/2
PERFORMANCES: 1/2
ENTERTAINMENT FACTOR: 2/2
TOTAL: 7/10
This issue would be magnified if the explosive and CGI fueled clashes were only passable, but Adam Wingard constructs these battles with such artistry and bravado that the incessantly terrible character writing only serves to be a minor hitch rather than a major roadblock.
The fights deliver on every technical scale: the sound is thunderous in its breadth while the twisting and flowing visuals surround you in their depth. It so wonderfully delivers on its promise of combat that it transforms the word “dumb” into an asset that provides meaningful returns on your investment. What seems like endless minutes of idiotic characters spouting exposition with a tiresome drawl is immediately forgiven when the two colossi lock eyes. You want to be forever shrouded in the shadows of these two goliaths, and Wingard’s confident framing is to credit.
The performances are passable as the actors only serve to provide slight hues of colour to their lifeless characters. The performances are nothing to write home about, and Wingard’s action-oriented direction does very little to help character-focused scenes, as he chooses to inject humor with an offbeat 70s soundtrack that only adds fleeting moments of brevity leading up to the anticipated battles. These moments highlight how fractional the structure of the film really is as it alternates between top tier filmmaking and bottom rung storytelling, creating an experience that is equally as jarring as it is awe-inspiring.
The duality inherent in the craftmanship of Godzilla vs. Kong is what keeps it from achieving true greatness as it constantly shifts gears moment to moment, creating a dichotomy within the definition of “dumb,” serving the traditional definition when our human counterparts are on screen but elevating it when the creatures’ bloodied faces fill up the frame.
As the cinematic masses continue to engage in repeat viewings of this film, don’t be surprised if the newest edition of Webster’s Dictionary has an asterisk next to dumb, simply displaying the title of this muddled, glorious mess of a motion picture.
A version of this article appeared in print in The Ontarion issue 190.5 on April 29, 2021.
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