Experts say in the future global turmoil will not have anything to do with race, religion, sexism, or climate issues. Instead, societal tensions will stem from zodiac signs and pseudoscience belief.
Anticipating that current and upcoming world leaders focus on climate issues in following years, turmoil that once stemmed from environmental issues will cease to exist. It is anticipated that tensions regarding race, religion, sexuality and gender will be resolved and thus no longer a primary issue for the global population. Instead, societal tension will stem from something understood and tweeted about since ancient times: Horoscopes.
Experts, including soothsayers, pseudoscientists, current astrologically obsessed instagram meme pages, say that the future holds tensions going beyond personality traits. “There is a rising interest in what zodiac signs have to offer, not just on an individual level but on a global scale,” stated Harmony Jade, a crystal collector and zodiac projectionist. Zodiac signs are already widely understood within pop culture, but attitudes regarding the signs are speculated to shift in such a way that they begin to affect our interpersonal interactions. “It just makes sense,” continued Jade. “Water signs stay with Water signs, Earth with earth, so on and so forth.”
It is anticipated that passive-aggressive comments such as “stop leosplaining” will become a prominent part of everyday language. Additionally, new words to define activism will shift to meet this changed societal norm. For example: “A ‘Geminist’ is someone who understands the struggle of being a Gemini in the astrological community,” says Agatha Agate, a self-proclaimed Geminist. “This sign is not the two-faced twin that everyone claims them to be. In fact, they are caring and adaptable. The fact Geminis are consistently placed on the same level Scorpios is just an atrocious jab to one of the greatest zodiac signs.”
Another large issue that will arise as a result of society’s new understanding of the zodiac, will be levels of compatibility. “People won’t care about gender — that’ll be a thing of the past. What’ll matter more is the compatibility of their signs and eventual place of residence,” commented Susan Citrine, who runs a well-known instagram account advocating for same-sign compatibility. “Virgos should stay within specific neighbourhoods made for Virgos, you know how wildly organized they get. It just makes sense. And think about it, the mere idea that a Taurus and an Aquarius could get married in our current society is disgusting. That’s going to change.” continued Citrine, who also added that one of her best friends is a Taurus.
Identification of the individual will shift as well. Geographic borders will change and passports will become irrelevant in the future. The only documentation that will be needed is an individual’s natal chart. “It explains so much about them as a person and where they will be able to fit in society. The rising or ascending, indicates the type of energy an individual gives off, while their sun sign tells about their identity,” explained Agate.
A major global change that is also expected, is the abolition of seasons and introduction of retrogrades. “The four seasons won’t really be needed anymore — or even really there, if the climate crisis continues like it’s going — so all we’ll need to follow are the six planets that retrograde,” says Harmony Jade “Those who claimed that fall was their favourite season will come to say ‘My favourite time of year is Saturn Retrograde in Capricorn.’ And, if I’m being honest, it really is my favourite time of year! I’m such a primary Pisces, I know,” Jade added excitedly. “But it’s just wonderful! The sense of pressure for upcoming tasks, investing energies, and how good is Spiced Saturn Latte, it doesn’t get better than that!” When asked how these experts know this will be society’s future, they responded “Oh honey, just look at the stars. You know, you can actually see the stars, so everything we’re saying must be true. You’re so inquisitive… must be a Libra.”